Remembering An Account Executive

A poem by Alan Dugan

He had a back office in his older brother’s

advertising agency and understood the human asshole.

He turned his father’s small inheritance over and over

on hemorrhoid ads between three-hour lunches

at the Plaza every day and cocktails at five-thirty

with different dressy women waiting in our front office.

We joked that he fucked them up the ass to make more customers

and were nauseated by him because he picked his ears

with the lead end of his lead pencil as he argued and argued

hemorrhoid copy with us on nauseating Mad. Ave. mornings.

Why argue? It must have been for executive power-feelings

because the copy never changed. Every week, the poor

bleeding assholes bought the shit. When my mind

began to get fucked and go as black as his inner ears

I quit as broke as I began, remembering his prophecy:

that the last working television set in the world

would be showing a hemorrhoid ad for ANUSALL

at Armageddon, that it would have been written

by him, that he would be watching it at 6:00 P.M.

in the bomb-cellar lounge of the Park Plaza Hotel

with a blonde’s ass in one hand and a scotch in the other,

and that he would die happy, with his old man’s

money intact and his asshole too, unlike us prat-boys.

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Poems in English 

• Slant by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Poem For People That Are Understandably Too Busy To Read Poetry by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Named by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Landscape At The End Of The Century by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• I Come Home Wanting To Touch Everyone by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Essay On The Personal by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Biography In The First Person by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• At The Smithville Methodist Church by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• Allegory Of The Cave by Stephen Dunn by Stephen Dunn
• The White Peacock by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Quality of Courage by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Innovator by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Hemp by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The General Public by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Fiddling Wood by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Drug-Shop, or, Endymion in Edmonstoun by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The City Revisited by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• The Breaking Point by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• Talk by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét
• Road and Hills by Stephen Vincent Benet by Stephen Vincent Benét

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Ecosia – a search engine that supposedly… plants trees

Duckduckgo – the real alternative and a search engine that actually works. Without much censorship or partisan politics.

Yahoo– yes, it’s still around, amazingly, miraculously, incredibly, but now it seems to be powered by Bing.

 

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