Remembering An Account Executive

A poem by Alan Dugan

He had a back office in his older brother’s

advertising agency and understood the human asshole.

He turned his father’s small inheritance over and over

on hemorrhoid ads between three-hour lunches

at the Plaza every day and cocktails at five-thirty

with different dressy women waiting in our front office.

We joked that he fucked them up the ass to make more customers

and were nauseated by him because he picked his ears

with the lead end of his lead pencil as he argued and argued

hemorrhoid copy with us on nauseating Mad. Ave. mornings.

Why argue? It must have been for executive power-feelings

because the copy never changed. Every week, the poor

bleeding assholes bought the shit. When my mind

began to get fucked and go as black as his inner ears

I quit as broke as I began, remembering his prophecy:

that the last working television set in the world

would be showing a hemorrhoid ad for ANUSALL

at Armageddon, that it would have been written

by him, that he would be watching it at 6:00 P.M.

in the bomb-cellar lounge of the Park Plaza Hotel

with a blonde’s ass in one hand and a scotch in the other,

and that he would die happy, with his old man’s

money intact and his asshole too, unlike us prat-boys.

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Bat’s Poetry Page – more poetry by Fledermaus

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Batty Writing – the bat’s idle chatter, thoughts, ideas and observations, all original, all fresh

Poems in English 

• Reproof: A Satire. by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• Tobias Smollett – Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• Love Elegy (in imitation of Tibullus) by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• “Let the nymph still avoid and be deaf to the swain” by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• To Independence by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• “From the man whom I love, though my heart I disguise,” by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• “Come listen, ye students of every degree” by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• Blue-Eyed Ann by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• Advice: A Satire. by Tobias Smollett by Tobias Smollett
• You Will Forget! by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• Words Of Love Forevermore by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• What Is Woman But A Song! by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• The Squirrel by Todd H. C. Fischer by Poetry In English
• The Pulling Away by Timothy Cole by Poetry In English
• The moon at noon by Tom Mukasa by Poetry In English
• The Leather Suitcase by Tom Berman by Poetry In English
• The Mocking Bird by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• The Heart That Is Pining by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• The Clime Of My Birth by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English
• The Bird Has Vanished by Timothy Thomas Fortune by Poetry In English

More external links (open in a new tab):

Russian Commerce Agency

Dealing Monster

Doska or the Board – write anything

Search engines:

Yandex – the best search engine for searches in Russian (and the best overall image search engine, in any language, anywhere)

Qwant – the best search engine for searches in French, German as well as Romance and Germanic languages.

Ecosia – a search engine that supposedly… plants trees

Duckduckgo – the real alternative and a search engine that actually works. Without much censorship or partisan politics.

Yahoo– yes, it’s still around, amazingly, miraculously, incredibly, but now it seems to be powered by Bing.

 

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