Remembering An Account Executive

A poem by Alan Dugan

He had a back office in his older brother’s

advertising agency and understood the human asshole.

He turned his father’s small inheritance over and over

on hemorrhoid ads between three-hour lunches

at the Plaza every day and cocktails at five-thirty

with different dressy women waiting in our front office.

We joked that he fucked them up the ass to make more customers

and were nauseated by him because he picked his ears

with the lead end of his lead pencil as he argued and argued

hemorrhoid copy with us on nauseating Mad. Ave. mornings.

Why argue? It must have been for executive power-feelings

because the copy never changed. Every week, the poor

bleeding assholes bought the shit. When my mind

began to get fucked and go as black as his inner ears

I quit as broke as I began, remembering his prophecy:

that the last working television set in the world

would be showing a hemorrhoid ad for ANUSALL

at Armageddon, that it would have been written

by him, that he would be watching it at 6:00 P.M.

in the bomb-cellar lounge of the Park Plaza Hotel

with a blonde’s ass in one hand and a scotch in the other,

and that he would die happy, with his old man’s

money intact and his asshole too, unlike us prat-boys.

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Poems in English 

• Warm are the Still and Lucky Miles by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• Voltaire At Ferney by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• Underneath an Abject Willow by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• This Lunar Beauty by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• They Wondered Why the Fruit had Been Forbidden by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Waters by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Wanderer by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Two by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Riddle by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Quest by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Quest XII (Vocation) by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Novelist by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Labyrinth by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Hidden Law by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Geography of the House by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Dream by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• The Common Life by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• Thanksgiving for a Habitat by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• Taller To-day by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)
• Song Of The Master And Boatswain by W H Auden by Wystan Hugh Auden (W.H. Auden)

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Ecosia – a search engine that supposedly… plants trees

Duckduckgo – the real alternative and a search engine that actually works. Without much censorship or partisan politics.

Yahoo– yes, it’s still around, amazingly, miraculously, incredibly, but now it seems to be powered by Bing.

 

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