Remembering An Account Executive

A poem by Alan Dugan

He had a back office in his older brother’s

advertising agency and understood the human asshole.

He turned his father’s small inheritance over and over

on hemorrhoid ads between three-hour lunches

at the Plaza every day and cocktails at five-thirty

with different dressy women waiting in our front office.

We joked that he fucked them up the ass to make more customers

and were nauseated by him because he picked his ears

with the lead end of his lead pencil as he argued and argued

hemorrhoid copy with us on nauseating Mad. Ave. mornings.

Why argue? It must have been for executive power-feelings

because the copy never changed. Every week, the poor

bleeding assholes bought the shit. When my mind

began to get fucked and go as black as his inner ears

I quit as broke as I began, remembering his prophecy:

that the last working television set in the world

would be showing a hemorrhoid ad for ANUSALL

at Armageddon, that it would have been written

by him, that he would be watching it at 6:00 P.M.

in the bomb-cellar lounge of the Park Plaza Hotel

with a blonde’s ass in one hand and a scotch in the other,

and that he would die happy, with his old man’s

money intact and his asshole too, unlike us prat-boys.

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Poems in English 

• November by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Mutation by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Love and Folly by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• June by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Inscription for the Entrance to a Wood by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• William Cullen Bryant – William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Hymn To Death by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Hymn of the City by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• Consumption by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• After a Tempest by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• A Song of Pitcairn’s Island by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• A Forest Hymn by William Cullen Bryant by William Cullen Bryant
• William Henry Davies by Fledermaus
• The Example by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• The Dark Hour by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• The Child and the Mariner by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• The Boy by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• The Bird of Paradise by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• The Best Friend by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies
• Sweet Stay-at-Home by William Henry Davies by William Henry Davies

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Duckduckgo – the real alternative and a search engine that actually works. Without much censorship or partisan politics.

Yahoo– yes, it’s still around, amazingly, miraculously, incredibly, but now it seems to be powered by Bing.

 

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