Remembering An Account Executive

A poem by Alan Dugan

He had a back office in his older brother’s

advertising agency and understood the human asshole.

He turned his father’s small inheritance over and over

on hemorrhoid ads between three-hour lunches

at the Plaza every day and cocktails at five-thirty

with different dressy women waiting in our front office.

We joked that he fucked them up the ass to make more customers

and were nauseated by him because he picked his ears

with the lead end of his lead pencil as he argued and argued

hemorrhoid copy with us on nauseating Mad. Ave. mornings.

Why argue? It must have been for executive power-feelings

because the copy never changed. Every week, the poor

bleeding assholes bought the shit. When my mind

began to get fucked and go as black as his inner ears

I quit as broke as I began, remembering his prophecy:

that the last working television set in the world

would be showing a hemorrhoid ad for ANUSALL

at Armageddon, that it would have been written

by him, that he would be watching it at 6:00 P.M.

in the bomb-cellar lounge of the Park Plaza Hotel

with a blonde’s ass in one hand and a scotch in the other,

and that he would die happy, with his old man’s

money intact and his asshole too, unlike us prat-boys.

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Bat’s Poetry Page – more poetry by Fledermaus

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Batty Writing – the bat’s idle chatter, thoughts, ideas and observations, all original, all fresh

Poems in English 

• Olney Hymn 50: The Christian by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 5: Jehovah-Shalom: The Lord Send Peace by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 48: Joy And Peace In Believing by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 47: The Hidden Life by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 45: The Happy Change by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 43: Prayer For Patience by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 40: Peace After A Storm by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 4: Jehovah-Nissi: The Lord My Banner by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 39: The Valley Of The Shadow Of Death by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 38: Looking Upwards In A Storm by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 36: Afflictions Sanctified By The Word by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 34: The Waiting Soul by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 33: Seeking The Beloved by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 32: The Shining Light by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 31: On The Death Of A Minister by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 30: The Light And Glory Of The Word by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 3: Jehovah-Rophi: I Am the Lord That Healeth Thee by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 29: Exhortation To Prayer by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 28: Jesus Hasting To Suffer by William Cowper by William Cowper
• Olney Hymn 27: Welcome To The Table by William Cowper by William Cowper

More external links (open in a new tab):

Russian Commerce Agency

Dealing Monster

Doska or the Board – write anything

Search engines:

Yandex – the best search engine for searches in Russian (and the best overall image search engine, in any language, anywhere)

Qwant – the best search engine for searches in French, German as well as Romance and Germanic languages.

Ecosia – a search engine that supposedly… plants trees

Duckduckgo – the real alternative and a search engine that actually works. Without much censorship or partisan politics.

Yahoo– yes, it’s still around, amazingly, miraculously, incredibly, but now it seems to be powered by Bing.

 

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