Love In Reverse by Talha Jafri

There is no love lost here,
I have moved on with a smile on my face
Illustrating the pain I went through with the ballsy attitude of trying to make things better for me
I often narrate so that I could make things better for all of us
Love ends up to be the course that everyone doesn’t want to take
Told myself that if I had a chance to turn back the clock I would…
Make myself go back through all the hurdles just to see how I went through them
The lessons that I learned from truly falling for a person
I ran through life because I could see the sun illuminating the night sky
The darkness that shadowed my soul is overturned by morals
Honing in on love and running towards you
I disguised myself from you, only so that you could find me
But here I am running in reverse to guide you back home with me
Because I didn’t just fall in love with you, I wanted to spend my life with you
It wasn’t easy to reach to the conclusion that you did
You shattered a piece of me that I can’t reach back now
Even if I tried my hardest, I can’t fix this perspective I have of you
So can we reversely fall in love?
I promise that I will be wary of whatever I did to make you not love me
It was such a shame that we parted, but it was the right thing
The future holds the greatest woman for me out there
And if I had time to run back through the hurdles I did with you,
Then life would be on pause for me and I would be here solving the answers to your riddles
Some things in life are better unsaid, the feelings I never said to you
You were the only one who didn’t read my love to you
I wrote a book for you to understand my feelings, but you never cared enough to ask for it
Exposing myself to the public, but I never exposed myself to you
The person who mattered to me, I ran in these circles for you to figure me out
But love isn’t in reverse,
It’s moving at a speed that I can’t keep at
If you had the heart to reject me right away, then you would have
But you made me go through these hurdles
And never asked me why I continued to love you the way I did
It was because I fell in love with you progressively and reversely
There were bumps along the way and eventually I fell apart trying to get to you
You had a heart that was too far to reach

Love happens progressively and I found you trying to figure me out
Never was I the puzzle for you to figure out
I put it all out for you to take it as it is
My heart was set on fire, you were suppose to be the water that put it out
Let my heart burn
No one told me that it was going to be this hard to try to win your love
Time runs continuously and love happens to run backwards
So if I was trying to figure this riddle you left me, then I must run back to the past
I must retrace my steps and love in reverse to get my answers
Going back to the days where I first laid eyes on you
The sight that you were and the impact that you had on me
Just on that very moment, I was able to see that this person is going to affect me
I’m going back to the start where it all began
I will run backwards with my past self to get to the moment where I first met you
My past self will be the infatuated man that he was
And my present self will look at you with the disgust I have of you now
I will come to my past self and punch him in the face
Stop him from ever continuing this charade
Because my past self doesn’t know how much hurt this girl will do to me
And if there was a way to stop myself from this waste
I would do it, but I wouldn’t be able to stop my feelings from reaching out to her
Because she isn’t a waste of time, she was the destiny that I never finished
She will always be my unfinished feelings
And I can’t get her out of my head that easily
I loved her progressively, too progressively that it was too fast for her
Someone who lives in the past might find it hard to deal with the present
And that’s exactly what I did to her
Perhaps I will never get the apology I want from her,
Maybe I don’t even deserve this apology
But I need some comfort from her,
Not the comfort that I created for myself
I went from being hopeless to having hope for myself
Because I decided to open up my soul to create these stories
An author that narrates his life finds that his life is worth narrating
And perhaps I shall create another story with the love that I had for her
To run back to where it all started,
And end the story before it even began.